Selasa, 26 Jun 2012

courage to live


Shall I stop writing?

All this while, his presence has inspired my writing a lot. I never feel so real and attached to my writing until he came into my life. Now, he decided to go and I don’t have right to stop him. But shall I stop writing? Or stay with my imagination that he will still be around? Either way, can't give back the memories...

I don’t have courage to meet him again even if it’s accidentally meeting. I’m weakening by his shadow! The memories will keep haunting me till my last breath. I will hide myself under the shell until it's fully recovered. I pray to God, to make me stronger than before, to stay optimist and to go on with my life.

It was my fault to stay closer; to let him discovered the untouched part in my life and to give him option to leave. 

‘… Never mind, I’ll find someone like you, I wish nothing but the best for you. Don’t forget me, I bet I remember you said; sometimes it lasts in love but sometimes it hurts instead.  Nothing compared no worries okay, regrets and mistakes their memories made. Who would have known how bitter sweet this would taste…’

I just hope that he will find someone fits him, who accept him for who he is and the same rank so he doesn’t have to feel lack of confidence. Someone who motivates him when he’s down, who can be his Google or help desk. Importantly, who makes him feel perfect. 

At this point, I go with the flow of my life… Yet, the outside world is so damn scary and slowly taken away my confidence to face it. 

I’m not desperately need replacement, and it’s better to stay this way. Hope he will achieve his dream without any difficulty.

Date   : 27.06.2012
Time   : 11:50 am